People (and I'll be using the term 'people' to describe a large range of the general public here) judge others based off what they know, and when they don't know anything they'll judge based off of appearances.
Myself included.
It's easy to judge young couples at Superstore and 30 year old women on the bus who are pregnant when you just go by their looks. Highly tattooed, wearing gungy clothing, looking like they hate the world.
My friends and family have got no issue with Will and I bringing a child into this world. That's because they know who Will and I are, what we're like, where we're at with our lives, and what our goals in life are.
What most people perceive being pregnant at 19 to be:
1. Immature. Irresponsible. Foolish
2. A mistake. An accident. Night out gone wrong
3. Losing out on a big part of your life
What being pregnant at 19 (in our case) is not:
1. Irresponsible, Stupid, Immature, Thoughtless. Sure, I'm 'only' 19, but like I've said in a previous post, marriage is always going to be hard - no matter the age. The same can be said for being pregnant. It's never going to be easy. Before you go around calling a couple irresponsible, I think it's important to know their full story.
2. A mistake. Sure, it might have been a surprise. And yes, we'll be the first to admit it's crazy. But when we got married we knew this is what we wanted and what we were getting ourselves into.
3. Missing out on the freedom and care-free lifestyle 'they' say you should get to enjoy during your 20s. I'm still meeting up with friends (and saving lots of money not buying drinks! 😛), Will and I still go adventuring, and I'm getting in lots of extra sleep (who said that's not care-free?!!?).
What being pregnant at 19 (in our case) is:
1. Something I've wanted for a long time. Anyone who knows me knows that I've always really wanted to be a mom. They even read it off the stage when I graduated that I was going to join the workforce until I could pursue a career of motherhood. People laughed, but it's what I wanted. And while my classmate are in college, doing practicums or apprenticeships, I'm aiming for motherhood.
2. Something that Will and I have thought and prayed very carefully and seriously about. Trust me, I made sure in the first few weeks of getting to know Will that he would be up for the challenge of having kids. We've always been very open and honest in our relationship to discussing children and how life would work when we'd have them.
3. It's fulfilling our marriage duties and cultural mandate. Personally, I feel like people who want to get married but don't want to have kids are wanting marriage for the wrong reasons. I think this is more and more prevalent in our Christian circles where young people want to live together and enjoy the benefits of living together but they don't want all the responsibilities that marriage includes. God blesses and commands us in Gen. 1:28a to, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it."
Myself included.
It's easy to judge young couples at Superstore and 30 year old women on the bus who are pregnant when you just go by their looks. Highly tattooed, wearing gungy clothing, looking like they hate the world.
My friends and family have got no issue with Will and I bringing a child into this world. That's because they know who Will and I are, what we're like, where we're at with our lives, and what our goals in life are.
What most people perceive being pregnant at 19 to be:
1. Immature. Irresponsible. Foolish
2. A mistake. An accident. Night out gone wrong
3. Losing out on a big part of your life
What being pregnant at 19 (in our case) is not:
1. Irresponsible, Stupid, Immature, Thoughtless. Sure, I'm 'only' 19, but like I've said in a previous post, marriage is always going to be hard - no matter the age. The same can be said for being pregnant. It's never going to be easy. Before you go around calling a couple irresponsible, I think it's important to know their full story.
2. A mistake. Sure, it might have been a surprise. And yes, we'll be the first to admit it's crazy. But when we got married we knew this is what we wanted and what we were getting ourselves into.
3. Missing out on the freedom and care-free lifestyle 'they' say you should get to enjoy during your 20s. I'm still meeting up with friends (and saving lots of money not buying drinks! 😛), Will and I still go adventuring, and I'm getting in lots of extra sleep (who said that's not care-free?!!?).
What being pregnant at 19 (in our case) is:
1. Something I've wanted for a long time. Anyone who knows me knows that I've always really wanted to be a mom. They even read it off the stage when I graduated that I was going to join the workforce until I could pursue a career of motherhood. People laughed, but it's what I wanted. And while my classmate are in college, doing practicums or apprenticeships, I'm aiming for motherhood.
2. Something that Will and I have thought and prayed very carefully and seriously about. Trust me, I made sure in the first few weeks of getting to know Will that he would be up for the challenge of having kids. We've always been very open and honest in our relationship to discussing children and how life would work when we'd have them.
3. It's fulfilling our marriage duties and cultural mandate. Personally, I feel like people who want to get married but don't want to have kids are wanting marriage for the wrong reasons. I think this is more and more prevalent in our Christian circles where young people want to live together and enjoy the benefits of living together but they don't want all the responsibilities that marriage includes. God blesses and commands us in Gen. 1:28a to, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it."
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